Do you ever feel like conflict in your relationship is always negative? It's easy to see it that way, but conflict can actually be an opportunity for growth. If you approach conflict with negativity, it will only breed more negativity and potentially harm your relationship. But if you approach it with a positive attitude, it can lead to personal and relationship growth.
The first step is to decide what emotion you want to feel. Do you want to feel angry, frustrated, resentful, and hopeless? These are all low vibrational emotions that can negatively impact your relationship. Alternatively, you can choose to feel acceptance, compassion, love, and gratitude, which are all higher vibrational emotions that can positively impact your relationship.
Next, it's important to understand that emotions are always in motion. Negative emotions are often triggered when your emotional needs are not met. This is the perfect opportunity to examine the story you're telling yourself about the trigger. Ask yourself questions like "Is this story going to breed more negativity?" and "What other possibilities can I create around this problem?"
It's also crucial to honor the feeling that you're having, even if it's anger. Anger can be a helpful tool for understanding your emotional needs. By identifying the emotion and the story around it, you can better articulate what you need from your partner. For example, if you need to feel appreciated and respond to a situation with anger, it may trigger your partner to become defensive or reactive. However, if you practice identifying the emotion and the story around it, you can communicate more effectively and ask for your need to be met in a clear and respectful manner.
Remember that conflict is inevitable in any relationship, but it's how you deal with it that matters. If you approach conflict as an opportunity for growth and are willing to be vulnerable, you can learn from the experience, grow as a person, and strengthen your relationship.
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